As a mother of a preschool child and a child psychologist, I have had the opportunity to interact with many child care providers on both a personal and professional basis.  I have gained so much admiration and respect for those of you who work with young children in the classroom.  You work long, hard hours to help the children in your classes gain the social, emotional, and developmental skills that they need.  What follows is a list of strategies that I have found to be useful for teachers in the classroom when they are having a stressful day on the job.

Have a routine.   Maintain routine as much as possible in your classroom.  Children behave better when they follow a routine because they know what to expect.  The more predictable the day is for your children, the more likely it is that they will cooperate.  Put up pictures to remind children of the routine.

Hold your reaction.  When you start to get upset, (1) count to ten, (2) take some deep breaths, and then (3) decide how to handle the situation.  By counting to ten, you take some time to think before acting.  By breathing deeply, you relax your muscles and drain away some of the stressful energy in your body.  Keep breathing deeply until you start to feel more in control and have a plan for how to handle the situation.

Recognize your feelings.  Remember that you are the adult!  What is behind this anger that you feel?  Did the children really make you this angry, or is there something else going on (like you’re having a bad day, feeling uncomfortable, or having relationship problems) that is pushing your feelings out of control? 

Close your eyes.  Shutting out visual input can help you to relax.  While you have your eyes closed, think about what the children are seeing and hearing, and what they are about to see and hear if you lose it.  Is this the memory that you want your children to take with them into their adult life?  Then, try to visualize the positive actions that you can take, like remaining calm and helping the children to calm down.

Use time out.   Put the child who is misbehaving in time-out (one minute for each year of the child’s age) or time-out the toy or activity that is causing the problem.  If you are especially angry at the child, try to get another teacher to monitor the child in time-out.  The goal is to try to separate yourself from the child who has triggered your anger for a few minutes.  This will help you to calm down and to feel like you have taken some action.

Put yourself in time out!  If there is another teacher in the classroom, try leaving the room for a minute or two.  If you can’t leave, sit down in a chair where you can still watch and keep everyone safe, but declare yourself off limits.  Ignore demands and requests for just a few minutes while you take some deep breaths and relax.

Distract yourself.  If you can take a short break, then find someone to talk to or call someone for a few minutes.  Tell the person that you just need to be distracted for a few minutes to calm down.  Ask for advice or just talk about the weather, whatever feels right at the time.

Go for a walk.  If another teacher can take over for a few minutes, try going for a walk. The fresh air and exercise will help you to clear your head and to relax your body.  In addition, try going on short walks during your breaks to get out of the building and away from everything for a minutes.

Use group exercise.   When if feels like the children in your classroom are getting out of control, help them get rid of some of their energy by doing some group exercises and dancing.  Consider taking them outside or to a gym for a few minutes even if it is not part of the normal schedule.

Sing.  If you like to sing and find it comforting, then start singing a song.  Try something loud and vigorous, or something soft and gentle, depending on what you need at the time.  If you don’t like to sing, turn on some music in your classroom.  Use soft music when you need to calm everyone down and use energizing music when you need something to lift your spirits.

Write.  Try putting feelings down on paper when you are upset or angry.  Write down what you want to say or do instead of actually doing it.  Be sure you destroy the paper afterwards.

Have some fun.  Do an activity that you really enjoy and the children really enjoy.  If you feel everyone needs it, forget the schedule and get the group started with a fun game or art project.  To make sure the children in your classroom do not think this is a new routine, tell them in advance that this is a special circumstance.

Use humor.  Think of something funny to distract yourself and the children when the stress is building in your classroom.  Just start laughing and children will stop what they are doing to see what you are laughing about.

Ease up.  When you are already feeling stressed, the last thing you need is more to worry about.  Focus on the crucial tasks for the classroom that day, and let the rest slide.  When you are running low on energy and patience, you do not want to get into battles over things like cleaning up the room with your children.  We all have bad days every once in awhile.

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